Today was a hard day...
I guess I sometimes don’t know how to begin an update and that’s the first thing that comes to mind.
Hard days..
Today is our 24 wedding anniversary. I did a lot of tearful reminiscing... like the way he calls me ‘hey sugar’ when I call or come into the room. ‘Hey sugar.’
Or when he needs to ask or tell me something he calls out ‘Hey Shelly.’
Or when I forget to record something in the checkbook, he raises his voice and calls out, ‘MICHELLLLEEE!’ Even that I miss.
Or the way he puts water on a dish or in a pan and sets it in the sink, saying ‘It needs to soak a little.’ With a mischievous grin.
(When actually it doesn’t.)
The way the boys scream ‘Daddy’s Home!!!’
The way he makes a nest in the place he sits on the couch. I am not sure exactly how he manages to undo the cushions so much, that each day after he goes off to work, I have to go fix only his spot.
Or the way he NEVER has a sick day, is a devoted provider and goes to work every day without complaint, even when he doesn’t want to.
I love the way he interacts with the boys and how,not only his devotion to them, but their devotion to him.
I love the way he treats Hannah.
DAD: Who moved my stuff! BOYS!!!
HANNAH: (sheepishly) I did that, Dad.
DAD: oh. It’s ok Hannah. Never mind.
How he gases up my car when it’s running low. So much so that I often fail to see how low I am, because I’m never low. Until the other day... on E. BELOW THE LINE. I crossed my fingers all the way to the gas station.
His predictability
His honesty
His stability
His infectious laugh that fills the whole house.
Or that every anniversary, the children eat dinner early and then prepare a beautiful meal for us and then disappear.
( although we ALWAYS call them midway through to share some bites ).
It’s just our way.
I visited him today. Sat there for a while watching him. He is the same. They keep trying to wean him off of oxygen but his body is just not able to at the moment. And really I felt deflated and wondered things I don’t want to wonder about.
‘Happy anniversary, honey. I love you.’ As I touched his cheek and kissed his beautifully big nose.
And then left and cried my eyes out.
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