Tuesday, May 14, 2019

Freaky Friday on Steroids

David is doing ok. Up and down, you know. Disability has yet to come and we are close to selling our home before we lose it. 

David and I don’t get too much me and him time. It may be we are avoiding it. All we do is fuss and cry because he wants my job and I want his. 

It’s still just so uncomfortable. And my job is very physical. I am soaking wet when I come home and I never used to sweat. 

I make 1/4 of what he made. My contribution feels so unhelpful. There are two people that give month to month.  But we can’t count on it. It’s a surprise every month. And it’s just presumptuous to except it. But it has been our life-jacket every time. 

I would love to say everything is wonderful and I am loving the work. One day, yes, one day, may it be so. 

We are here; healthy as can be. And the mortgage is paid this month. Day by day. Month by month. This is how we live. I personally want to sink. But I love too much to desire such a thing. 

And my heart. It aches. Spiritually; physically. What a scary thing. 


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1 comment:

  1. I have no words but please know you and your family are always in my prayers. Don't get discouraged with the disability situation. It took my sister's brother-in-law ten "attempts" at it before it was finally granted (he has seizures). I know that's probably not encouraging, but I tell you because it can happen if you keep applying similar to how insurance will pay a claim if you keep submitting it.

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